Sleepless in Des Moines

One of the joys of midlife is sleepless nights. Thankfully they aren't nearly as often as they used to be. I went through a three year spell where it was pretty much nightly. I put an alarm clock under the couch so that when I finally would drift to sleep around 3-4 am I would still be able to wake up at 5:30 am. It was a very dark time. How I thank God for a book I found in the back room of a little shop in Stillwater, Minnesota on hormones. As I read that book the chapters spoke loud and clear to me that at the age of 45 I was in pre-menopause and if I didn't find some help soon my employer and my husband would probably have me committed. I remember thinking at the time "no wonder so many couples divorce after 25-30 great years of marriage. This hormone thing was like the story "where's Waldo" because truly, I had no idea who I was and what they'd done with the real Julie.


Now when I wake up in the morning it's very seldom; and I usually use it as an opportunity to spend a little more time with God. "If you seek me you will find me"--a favorite scripture and one I live by. As I was laying in bed fighting sleep, I was reminded this morning (because it's 1:30 am in Des Moines) of the scripture from Psalm 121:3 that says "He will not let your foot slip--he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep." Love that. While I cannot sleep, my gracious God is listening to my ramblings this morning, letting me hop up on his lap and listening to me as if I were the only one in the world. He hears me when I talk, and wants to listen to me. I'm sleepless; He is not. Gonna talk to him a bit more and listen to a song by Kari Jobe that really speaks my heart. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U3GijrnfStk Then I'll wait for slumber to finally come for me. He obviously has something he wants to tell me.